1st Runner-Up: Grant Williams

Villain: Buffalo Bill, Novel: The Silence of the Lambs

Dear Diary,

Slow day today. Went to the store to get some dog food and some of that lotion with the oatmeal in it. Had a coupon. Saved 55 cents. I should have waited until Wednesday when they double coupons, but things are drying out at home. Got distracted in the makeup section for a while.
The scrawny woman stocking the shelves asked me if I needed any help. I mumbled under my breath that she’d need to gain some weight first. When she said she couldn’t hear me I told her that I was just picking some things up for a friend. Maybe someday I’ll have the confidence to really tell people what I think.
So flustered I left with a tube of lipstick that makes me look like a trashy clown.
Stopped by Joann Fabric next to get some thread. I’ve got a huge sewing project to finish up.
Gotta go. I think someone is trying to break in.
-B. Bill

2nd Runner-Up: Tierney Green

Villain: Bellatrix Lestrange Novel: Harry Potter Series 

Monday 1st September

8st 3 (can still fit in best corset- huzzah!), murders 3 4, muggles killed 12 (getting a little lax).

Noon. Malfoy Manor. Potter boy didn’t show up on Hogwarts express. Typical. Dark Lord is annoyed but not surprised.

2.30 Killed the moron responsible for taking several Death Eaters to search train instead of being at their posts. Dark Lord hasn’t noticed yet but hoping it makes him happy.

2.35 Still no thanks from Dark Lord.

2.45 Nothing as yet. Not even comment on my wandwork or new “revenge" robes (figured it’s best to be prepared for all occasions).

3pm Spoke to Sissy in fire. She thinks he was probably busy thinking about how to kill Potter so didn’t have time to notice little niceties. Humph.

5.20 Success! He laughed and said it was good to get such idiots out from under his feet. We exchanged a meaningful look. Was glorious. Think am still his favourite.

6.30 Still. Would be nice to be appreciated for more than just bloodlust. Lucius all huffy because Dark Lord still thinks he’s a wet blanket. Threw his cane at me when I pointed out that he kind of is.

7pm Snape came round. Is still a tosser. Boasted about searching the school even though Potter wasn’t there anyway. Dark Lord thanked him and congratulated him on his thoroughness.

How does that greasy git get praise for bossing people about when I put in effort myself and it’s barely noticed? Ugh. Men.