ONE-STAR REVIEWS OF HAMLET

dukeofbookingham:

“Hamlet is a whiny brat who should try shutting his mouth long enough to actually do something about his situation instead of hovering in an annoying state of indecision and self-doubt!”

“To read or not to read, that is the question. Sadly, I didn’t have a choice, because it was part of the syllabus for Grade 12 at school.”

“I know he sees a ghost, and goes mad, and kills people, but that’s not really a character. He’s just a mad asshole.”

“The best part was when Hamlet died and the story was over.”

“this book deserves 0 stars. shakespeare killed off all characters like who the hell is left man.”

“Not really a book i would recomend but I don’t regret reading it because it’s ‘cult’ to read shakespear.”

“Hamlet is a little bitch.”

“I’d rather just rewatch The Lion King again.”

“One star is my personal gift to Hamlet for being an asshole to Ophelia.” 

“SPOILER ALERT* Hamlet makes out with his mom then everyone dies the end” 

And the real hero here:

“Can I or can I not give it 0 stars? That is the question. Whether ‘tis nobler in the ears to suffer the slings and errors of outrageous analysis or to take arms against an essay of troubles and by writing it, end it. To write, to listen no more and by listening to say we end the heartache and thousand skull-splitting headaches that English class is heir to–'tis a consummation devoutly to be wished. To write, to listen, to listen perchance to get an A. Ay, there’s the rub. For in that all-nighter of death what ideas may come when we have shuffled off that insightful commentary must give us pause. There’s the boredom that makes English class so long of a period. For those who bear the whips and scorns of “nope you’re wrong,” th’ oppressor’s wrong, the proud man’s contumely, the pangs of despise and hate, the grades’ delay, the insolence of office, …… since brevity is the soul of wit, worst unit in English class ever.” 

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