zeus spoiled rich kid that gets away with everything

poseidon surfer dude

hades just a simple banker trying to live his simple life

hera suburban wine mom

apollo stoner that plays wonderwall in a college campus quad

artemis hardcore feminist and queer activist

dionysus philosopher by day, hardcore partier by night

hestia your grandma

aphrodite tyra banks

ares overly aggressive gamergate dudebro

hephaestus under appreciated i.t. employee who fixes everything, probably actually the xkit guy

hermes that one asshole who's always on his bluetooth

athena hermione

demeter little old lady who runs an organic produce stand at your local farmer's market but could 11/10 kick your ass