modern greek gods

zeus: spoiled rich kid that gets away with everything
poseidon: surfer dude
hades: just a simple banker trying to live his simple life
hera: suburban wine mom
apollo: stoner that plays wonderwall in a college campus quad
artemis: hardcore feminist and queer activist
dionysus: philosopher by day, hardcore partier by night
hestia: your grandma
aphrodite: tyra banks
ares: overly aggressive gamergate dudebro
hephaestus: under appreciated i.t. employee who fixes everything, probably actually the xkit guy
hermes: that one asshole who's always on his bluetooth
athena: hermione
demeter: little old lady who runs an organic produce stand at your local farmer's market but could 11/10 kick your ass
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